Thursday, March 28, 2013

Holy Geez! + Ab-tastic Workout

Holy Mother of Paincakes my legs are DYING from that workout I posted yesterday.  I mean Geesh! That workout did its job and I am feeling the hellacious pain of muscle gain. Yowza.

Question for you guys: I am a mom, does anyone else make up rediculous "non-cussing" cuss words, for the sake of your child's innocent ears, that make you sound like a crazy fool?  It's actually fantastic and gives me a chance to be creative on the fly. Because, lets face it, I am initially going for the full blown f bomb or sh!# or s.o.b. But then at the last second this comes out:

Fruity Biscuit
Holy Shipstick
Mother....of pearl
Truck at a truckin truck stop
Bull Butter
Son of Biscuit
CUSS WORDS!! (Yes I actually yell "Cuss Words!" at the top of my lungs. Like when I step on a lego.)
Mother Trucker

Then there's "I need to have a talk with your dad." which I say very angrily while pulling my husband into our room and is code for a trip to funky town.
Side note: We don't have a lock on our bedroom door....yah.  So that's why we have to make him think that there is a disagreement or something going on because he will avoid us like the plague if he thinks we might be talking about anything confrontational. Then we walk out of the room 10 minutes later, disheveled and blissfully happy.  He may have a very "trucked up" idea of what happens when couples fight....

So that's the story of my feeble attempts to keep Bud's innocence intact.

I love the sound of unconscious children.
Because that's the only time I can talk without a filter....

As a reward for the funky town reference earlier, I've got an ab workout for you today.
(I am going to walk 10 minutes and run 15 minutes before this workout to get me warmed up.)

Do this workout 1-3 times through depending on your level of fitness

Plank - 30 seconds
Side Plank Hip Taps - 20 each side
Jack Knife Situps - 10
Bird Dogs (from plank position) - 20
Dive Bombers - 10
Russian Twists - 20
Mountain Climbers - 30
Spiderman Plank - 20

BAM! Flat-tastic abs. You. Are. Welcome.
As always not certified in anything just sharing my workouts. Consult a physician before you start a new workout regime.

Also just for pictures sake.  Here is me when I have to come in to work before 6:00am. Happy....but tired and disheveled......a touch of dirty transient is happening here... and a big blemish on the forehead. Lovely.

Please share your hilarious non-cuss words with me in the comments section! Let's sound like idiots together.

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